Jesus Heal Miracles Love College Store Outlet

Talking to God

A man climbs to the top of Mt. Sinai to get close enough to talk to God.

Looking up, he asks the Lord... "God, what does a million years mean to you?"

The Lord replies, "A minute."

The man asks, "And what does a million dollars mean to you?"

The Lord replies, "A penny."

The man asks, "Can I have a penny?"

The Lord replies, "In a minute."

Bad Golfer

Jim was 26 over par by the eighth hole, had landed a fleet of golf balls in the water hazard, and dug himself into a trench fighting his way out of the rough, when his caddy coughed during a 12-inch putt. Jim exploded.

"You've got to be the worst caddy in the world!" he screamed.

"I doubt it," replied the caddy. "That would be too much of a coincidence."

POSTED BY: Cindy Lee AT 11:20 am | Permalink | E-mail this

New Diet

Jan is terribly overweight, so the doctor hands over
a sheet of paper with a diet on it.

"I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day,
and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you,
you'll have lost at least five pounds.

When Jan returns, The doctor's amazed
to see a loss of nearly 20 pounds.

"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says.
"Did you follow my instructions?"

Jan nods, "I'll tell you, though, I thought
I was going to drop dead that third day."

"From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.

"No, from skipping."